Speechless

Okay so like Jimmy I’m thinking about thinking. I read over our texts and it seems like I said some guilt tripping things. I’ve analyzed what you have said. I wasn’t trying to guilt trip you at all :( and it seems like you really want to hang out with your friends. So tomorrow just hang out with them instead of me. From the way you respond it seems like you think stuff like hanging out with your friends makes me mad but it doesn’t sweetie. I think you think that our relationship is the top priority, IT ISN’T! Remember if anything is bothering you just tell me even if it makes me feel upset. WE’RE IN THIS TOGETHER :) To answer your question earlier, I feel like we don’t see each other a lot. The reason why I like to be with you a lot is because every second I’m thinking about you and when you’re not there it’s like a dagger to my heart. You see your friends everyday at school but I only get glimpses of you. What really got me thinking was when Ann said “lol Debbie said is Julie not going to the dance cause Michael won’t let her” I really took that into consideration and what she said really hurt me. I won’t stop you from going to anything you want to go to. I’m personally jealous of your friends because they get to see you and your amazing self everyday. I think they take you for granted. In the beginning the girls didn’t even like you. Jeanette, Debbie, etc thought you were weird and creepy but I defended you. I started to bring you along and then you girls became friends. Now they act like they love you more than I do. I know that it’s hard choosing between me and them, but honestly choose them because I don’t want them saying “she’s always picking Michael” Sorry if it feels like I’m trying to be the number one priority. I know you want a grip of your life with your friends. I apologize from the bottom of my heart. I will never bother you ever again because I know you’re feeling inside that I’m taking you away from your friends, but I’m not trying to. Sorry that I’m distracting you from schoolwork, keeping you up when you’re tired and then getting mad when you fall asleep. What makes me mad is not what you do or say but that you keep stuff to yourself. Just let everything off your chest. So tomorrow let’s cancel our plans. Hang out with them because you barely get to see them. I’ll be fine tomorrow; I can always catch up on sleep :) This was a long message, thanks for taking your time to sort through this mess. We from now on will hang out on your terms cause that makes you happy and if it makes you happy it makes me happy. I can get used to it. Again I don’t want you to ever choose between your friends or me. Sorry for the troubles I cause you. Have a wonderful day and good morning Julie :)